Student Plea

Student: Sir, sir, please give us bonus points.

Me: Because...

Student: The price of petrol, sir. It is down. We are poor now. We need help...

Update: Yes, the student was joking as he drove off in a 2008 Landcruiser...

Contrasting days

Yesterday I was "walking on sunshine."

Today I broke a toilet seat.

And that was not the low point.

Taking lack of sleep to a whole new level

You may read the ridiculously long post below and wonder, "Does Steve have a life?" Nah, of course not. I just don't sleep.

At 3AM yesterday morning I completed the cheater's full proof exam: Eight different versions. I was very satisfied with myself because in the land of A+ cheaters I had devised the perfect weapon. I knew I wouldn't be able to sleep so I took an Ambien. I was still reading news around 4AM. The clock woke me at 6AM. I left to print my cheat-proof tests by 7AM.

Two hours sleep. No big deal; done that before. Well, it's 4AM again and I'm still not asleep.

For those keeping score that's now 2 hours of sleep in 44 hours.

I have to wonder to what degree my internet addiction is to blame. Surely if I had no blog, google news, or e-mail I'd be asleep by now.

My experience in Nepal proved it.

Helped by a little Ambien.

Another Spellmanism - An appropriate 400th post

Days when you see justice happen are happy days.

Far too many days you find yourself getting screwed and in our polite society we feel the need to say, "Thank you!"

Twenty years ago I sat in Spellman's office and learned the phrase, "Fuck you very much."

I've never said it aloud but I have learned to smile, shake someone's hand, and say it under my breath.

It's quite Zen-like. I'm sure the Buddhists would approve.

Miscellaneous news

The Supreme Court of India has ruled that a married man having sex with a woman who is not his wife is committing rape. At first I thought, “That will cut down the extra-marital affairs.” The more I think about the more I think it’s a pretty bad ruling.

*****
Imagine a rich and populous country with no movie theaters. I live next door to one. And that’s about to change.

*****
A man is eaten by a shark and his son hears his screams… yet the family is sanguine by citing what the now deceased wrote back in 2004:

"I have always had an understanding with my wife that if a shark or ocean accident caused my death then so be it, at least it was doing what I wanted."

For the record, I don’t feel the same way. If I die here it will be under the wheels of a LandCruiser. In addition to the blood money that will be sent my family I hope one of you take it upon yourselves to avenge my death!

******
Here’s something you don’t expect from me: I hope Obama does not rescind his choice for Inaugural invocation. To do so now would be caving to the left and the gay community. In the future I hope he’ll show some spine and support ENDA (anti-gay discrimination) and repeal “Don’t ask, Don’t tell”. If Obama caves now it will make action on those fronts more difficult in the future because he’ll been seen as pandering to gays.

Obama had remarkably few gaffes in the campaign but I remember wincing when he told Hillary in a debate, “You’re likable enough.”

Which is why I can’t help but appreciate Frank Rich’s “You’re likable enough, gay people”.

******
I’ll close with economics. In turbulent times it’s helpful to listen to a Midwesterner who was not born wealthy but became one of the richest people in the world. Warren Buffet has been through it all. His predictions for 2009 are the best link to click on this entire post…

My favorite economist (I’d be a groupie if it wouldn’t be too creepy) Paul Krugman argues that home mortgage rates are still too high. Given where Fed rates are, he’s right.

Glenn Hubbard (Bush’s former econ advisor with real conservative credentials) takes it a step further. He wrote a piece in the Journal saying the government should let everyone who can afford the payments buy a house or refinance at 4.5%. His argument: Why give the money to the banks when it’s clear they are not going to lend it out?

He makes a valid point and has left many liberal economists with their jaws dropped to the floor. Hubbard puts the price tag at $340 billion.

Here’s my bold prediction for 2008: We’re going to see something like this in the Obama stimulus package.

It solves many problems: 1. It will quickly put a floor in housing prices. Right now people are sitting on the sidelines waiting for prices to drop more. That type of deflation can kill an economy (see Japan of the 1990’s… it’s almost hard to remember how much we Americans feared them in the 1980’s, isn’t it?). 2. It’s an investment in something real. The government isn’t giving you anything. It’s giving you a chance to buy a house (or refinance). It’s a real asset. Even if some default the government will do better collecting 4.5% than it is currently getting on long term bonds – under 2%. 3. It’s a stimulus people understand and would be popular. I know how easy it is to rag on the TARP bailout. The term “TARP” alone is reason to hate it. The fact is, without TARP our current bad problems would be much worse. I know that’s hard to believe…

Update: I lied; there's more... for the aspiring political and econ geeks (that's you if you are still reading this exhaustive, never ending piece) there's this insightful post from Nate Silver at 538... a sports guy who is neither an economist or a political scientist.

Update II: Oops, only uber-geeks will follow this one: In the post above I said I originally said I hoped Obama would support DOMA instead of ENDA. Now for the non-geeks I'll translate. I originally said I hoped Obama would defend traditional marriage against gay marriage. What I meant to say was that I hoped Obama would support the "Employment Non-Discrimination Act", a very different bill!

A little ole fashioned karma!

I have written and retracted a detailed post explaining why I am so happy. Yeah, I know you're sick of it but this is another case of "I like turtles." But in this case I really, really do like turtles!

Here's the abbreviated version: In the five months I have been in this country I have only met two people I... I... well, let’s just say don’t like:  The first guy because he’s corrupt, and the second is the boss’ boss of the corrupt guy.   Either  the senior guy is completely incompetent when corruption is brought to his attention or he, himself, is on the take.

Either way, word came today that the services of the top guy are no longer needed.

All day long I've been singing, "It's a beautiful day...", "I'm walking on sunshine..." and the complete Willie Nelson song:

There's just a little fashioned karma coming down
Just a little old fashioned justice going round
A little bit of sowing and a little bit of reaping
A little bit of laughing and a little bit of weeping
Just a little old fashioned karma coming down...

It really ain't hard to understand
If you're gonna dance you gotta pay the band
It's just a little old fashioned karma coming down

Nepal from Ann's camera - feeding monkeys

I am handing an orange slice to this monkey. He was one of the smaller ones and I gave him cover as he ran away to keep the bigger monkeys from stealing it from him.

Nepal from Ann's camera - night life

I'm glad this picture came out. That's me off to the left. This dark restaurant was only lit by candles and the lanterns in this picture. We sat on pillows on the floor. Very cool ambiance.

We ran out of time and I missed this show.

Nepal from Ann's camera - Miscellaneous

One of the cool sights in Nepal are the trucks. Almost all of them are decorated. Some have so many flowers and statues on the front window you wonder how they are able to see out.
Here is Spidey. (The "Push horn" is because the roads are narrow and steep in this mountainous country. The sign urges those about to pass to blow the horn so the driver of this vehicle can try to move over.)

This is the official headdress for the Nepalese. I asked if it was offensive for a westerner to wear it and was told it was an honor. Then again, the guy was trying to sell me the hat.

This is Ann making fun of my lunch order. It was a great Chinese restaurant and all I had was sweet and sour soup, fried cabbage, spring rolls and cashew chicken.

It's not like I ordered dessert...

Nepal from Ann's camera - Chitwan

This is our hotel room at Chitwan. (The one with the scary lock.) The room was $8/night and the view was beautiful.


This is the sidewalk to our room.

At first seeing an elephant on the sidewalk made our heads turn. By the third day I was at an internet cafe and one walked by and I barely noticed.

A Chitwan taxi (seriously).

Duning

I finally went duning today. A group of us rented quad runners and went to the dunes.Some of the dunes are steep. This guy went end over end the last time he went out. I chose a small 100cc model. I figured if I rolled it I would only break some bones.
It was a lot of fun and only $15 for an hour (which was more than enough time). Several times I ended up in a valley and thought to myself, "Now how am I going to get out of here?"
I didn't sign so much as a "I accept responsibility" waiver. At one point my leg got under the wheel. I accidentally hit the accelerator. My calf muscles are going to hurt for a while.

Dubai Mall

They don't do anything small in this country.
When I heard there was an aquarium in the mall I wasn't expecting rey's...
... and sharks
Santa dropped by to do something...

Nepal Day 12 - Departing Katmandu

On the morning I woke up early and took pictures from the roof of the hotel I was greeted by this dog. He was clearly a domestic dog with a collar but it appeared the string that had him tied up had broke. He was a wonderful dog! On the last day, an hour before departure I was walking along and he bounded up to me. It broke my heart to leave him behind.

I hope he's OK.

A parting view of the Himalayas from the airport.

Merry Christmas...

I had a wonderful Christmas with Ann's friends. It was quite the experience to have Christmas with the Brits!

I'll write more later but this single post is costing me $5 so I need to sign off.

Mary Lundby: A class act (in her own way) and a force to be reckoned with

(Picture from the Register.)

Mary Lundby served as a Republican state senator from Marion. She's a remarkable woman. Sadly, she's losing her battle with cancer. Iowa is losing one of its greats. If only more politicians in both parties were as willing to speak out like Mary we'd all be better off.

I hope she pulls through this holiday season but when the time comes I hope they play Sinatra's "My Way" at her funeral. She certainly blazed new trails in Iowa.

Merry Christmas from Gus

My niece took this picture at the family gathering this past weekend. Gus is looking good but getting a little more grey on his chin.

Compared to some others, this has been a nice Christmas. I've spent several Christmases working at empty weather stations. I scheduled myself long shifts on Christmas Eve and Christmas Day to allow the others the time off.

This Christmas is certainly odd. It was hot today - upper 80's. I'm still running the air conditioning in my apartment even though it's almost 10PM. As I was walking to my car I was singing "Walking in a winter wonderland" and started laughing as I realized the absurdity.

Tomorrow I'm joining Ann and Mike and their friends for a day in Dubai. We're staying at a hotel and having a Christmas feast.

I'm not expecting any presents under the... umm... well, I don't have a tree. I doubt Santa could find me. Several have asked for my address. I haven't been blowing off the requests. I simply don't have one. I live in a brand new (crappy) building. They haven't decided what to call it yet.

I could give some suggestions.

Anyhow, Merry Christmas!
Steve

Nepal Day 11 - Full moon over Kathmandu

I wish we had made it back to the hotel in time to get the pic of the moon on the horizon. It was spectacular.

Nepal Day 11 - Lessons from a little monkey bitch

A child was holding a bag of peanuts. This monkey ripped it out of his hands sending peanuts flying everywhere. Even though there were more peanuts than she could possibly eat she scared away the other monkeys. I thought it would be an interesting to see what she'd do if I put an orange slice in front of her. Which would she prefer?

The answer? Peanuts. After she ate her fill of peanuts she ate the orange slice. I guess it was dessert.

*****
I wasn't sure what the word was for a female monkey. It turns out it is just "female." How unoriginal. Whatever. This one was a bitch.

In doing my research I came across this little gem.

Nepal Day 11 - Monkey Temple

On our last full day we went to another Buddhist temple - The Monkey Temple. I came prepared with a bag of oranges. This monkey made quick work of my gift.

I wouldn't want to imply monkeys are stupid, but they are not about to give dogs a run for their money. If we had the oranges out we'd be flocked by begging monkeys. All Ann had to do was put them in her purse and they'd walk away.

Out of sight of mind - instantly.

I bought a piece of coconut. (Which doesn't take like coconut, by the way. If I had been blindfolded I'd of thought I was eating almonds.) As I was walking along a monkey flew out of nowhere and jumped up on me to grab it. I was startled but cupped the remaining coconut in my hands and he walked away disinterested.

Again, I love the Eyes of Nepal...
Prayer wheels come in all sizes. They sell small ones to carry around and the temples had some the size of a Volkswagen. The rule is always go clockwise.

You now know the extent of my knowledge of the Buddhist religion philosophy.

Nepal Day 10 - Odds and ends

Can you believe this headline?

OK, a burger joint trying this signage in America would have Burger King's lawyers in their door before the fries got cold.

That's what's odd: There is NO Burger King (or McDonalds or other fast food) in Katmandu. They are ripping off signage from a company that has no presence in the country.

Perhaps this is why GM is going bankrupt. These signs were everywhere. In 12 days I did not see ONE GM car on the streets.

Nepal Day 10 - City views

There are no high rises in this poor country. Most buildings are 3 or 4 stories tall and house many families. As I wrote below the densely populated city is very easy to walk from end to end.

Nepal Day 10 - Monkeys up close and personal

Seeing monkeys on the sidewalk is so different than going to the zoo...

Nepal Day 10 - Buddhist Temple

Ann and I walked from the Hindu temple to a Buddhist temple. The two religions very peacefully coexist. We asked many people what religion are you? The consistent reply was "I am Hindu (or Buddhist) but we all get along."

The Buddhist temples were much more relaxed than the Hindu temples. Hindu temples had many signs, "Hindu only allowed in here." Or "No cameras" whereas the Buddhists embraced the tourists, set up shops and monks even solicited tips.

Then again, Ann and I may be biased after seeing the Tina Turner "What's Love Got to Do With It" movie.
I like the eyes of Nepal. I bought T-shirts and paintings with the eyes.

In this picture you see workers whitewashing the temple while people walk clockwise around the temple praying.

Here are some monks. I wish I had captured a pic of the ones wearing Reebok tennis shoes.

Nepal Day 10 - Sunrise over Katmandu

I awoke early and went to the roof of our hotel.
On rooftops all across the city I saw women hanging up laundry. The honking on the streets increased by the minute. Ann and I tried to count the number of honks we heard in one minute. We lost count.

Nepal Day 10 - Hindu temple

We walked all the way to the east end of Katmandu. (For a city of 700,000 it was remarkably easy to walk from end to end.) This Hindu temple is a UN protected heritage site.

We didn't know that funeral cremations happen every day. We watched men build a funeral pyre. The body was brought along on a stretcher. The face uncovered and ceremoniously washed by the grieving family members.
The smoke here is a cremation in progress when we arrived.

There's one body wrapped in white cloth. The second body wrapped in orange cloth was moved to a pyre out of camera range.

As a photographer I want to capture everything but capturing someone's pain in a funeral was a line I didn't want to cross. (There were some people down close to the ceremony taking pictures.) Ann and I moved to a vantage point more than a football field away where visitors stood with guides taking pictures. These pictures are the result of zooming in and cropping.

The final picture (also taken from a good distance) is of two men painted up with dust in their beards. Ann's Lonely Planet explained that we'd see them. I just don't remember why.

When $34 oil is not (really) $34 oil

This is a two part story.

1. On Wednesdays the US releases oil supply numbers at 9:30 Iowa time. I, of course, catch the announcement on CNBC whenever I can. (Stop saying "geek". I can hear you.)

Often the announcement is no big deal because it falls in line with what the market already expected. This past Wednesday they announced a much larger oil inventory than expected. The price dropped from $38 to $36 in less than a minute.

OPEC panicked and five minutes later released a statement that they were cutting oil production by 4.2 million barrels.

Holy production cuts, Batman, that's the biggest cut ever!

By 10:40 oil was trading at $40. For those of you playing along at home that's a drop of $2 and a raise of $4 in less than 10 minutes. I got whiplash watching the chart.

Then traders read the full report from OPEC. The 4.2 million figure included a 2 million cut in September. The real cut is 2.2 million, which is what the market expected all along. Not surprisingly, oil started dropping.

By Friday it went below $34/barrel. Stunning. The market told OPEC, "Don't get cute. Tell us the real news. You played a stunt and that tells us you can't get your act together."

*****
2. The drop was amazing, but not as amazing as it may have seemed. $1.00 gas is not on the horizon.

Basically, there is a glut of oil in refineries in the US right now AND fog has kept oil tankers from docking in Houston. Therefore, delivery for oil in January has absolutely cratered - down to below $34.

Oil for February is at $42.

Are conservatives this stupid?

Pause... Count to ten...

The Washington Examiner ran a piece that has been e-mailed to me by my conservative friends. It's not worth reading. I only provided the link to prove I'm not making it up.

The guy is arguing that the future obligations of the US are greater than the current assets. I won't dispute his math (which is disputable). My reaction: Who cares?

I imagine someone coming to me in a panic: "Steve, do you have enough assets to pay all of your bills - mortgage, electricity, heating oil, credit cards, etc. for the next 50 years?"

"Umm, no."

"Then you are bankrupt. You are bankrupt!"

*****
With this type of insightful analysis Obama's headed for a long eight years.

And I have probably just lost a few conservative friends.

News

Whether you are likely to have a boy depends on whether the father has more brothers than sisters. Why do I care? A friend (who shall remain nameless but she likes to talk about her enormous stove) posited the theory that the father's endowment played a role in the decision. A theory that has been humorously disproven in discussions with college friends.

By the way, my niece Gina has announced that she's expecting. I will become a great uncle. Oh well, I'm over 40 and several classmates have grandkids... I don't think she got that trip to Europe and now it will be a whole lot more complicated.

Gina's husband Jim has two brothers. If the story above is true Gina can expect to have a boy.  If Karey's my friend's theory is true, well, I have nothing to say but, "Congratulations Gina and Jim!"

*****
Huh? Here's a map that shows county-by-county what percentage of people die because of weather. Surprisingly the safest place to live is a major city or the midwest. Given recent weather that may be a shock. What I don't understand is that Benton County is pink, meaning that Benton has a higher than normal death rate due to weather. I'm not aware of ANYONE dying from weather. Hmmm.

*****
And there is much sadness among Star Trek fans. The voice of the computer is dead. Prior to a career as a computer Majel Barrett played Nurse Chapel on the original Star Trek and shared a bed with Gene Roddenberry.

How can they make another episode without the voice of the computer? That'd be like Darth Vader without James Earl Jones! Oh wait, they did that and Hayden Christiansen wasn't very convincing.

Paintball

I suck. Case closed.

Scooby and the Mystery Van must be near by

We decided to take a picture of their products:
Woah, man, I must be trippin. I see Ann and me and a Coke truck passing by...

My friend Matt is shaking his head, "'Trippin'? You really are over 40..."