Hey, look, Mommy! It's a shiny new plane!

Please indulge my aviation geekness...

My flight on Wednesday is the only direct from this country to Chicago.  It is Etihad flight 151 Abu Dhabi direct to Chicago.  The route's been open for two years and all along it's been flow by Airbus A340's.

Starting tomorrow the plane making the trip will be a Boeing 777 ER(Extended Range).  That's means I'll be flying in a brand new, hot off the assembly line jet that Etihad took possession of just a few weeks ago.  Exciting, right?

The TV screen, on demand shows/movies/music/games should be unmatched.  Given that I will be on only the third flight that has passengers I suspect it will still have that new airplane smell.

So why I am not jumping for joy?  By all accounts the 777 is a well designed, very safe plane - I'd rather be on it than any model of the Airbus.  But are there kinks in this particular one that hasn't been worked out?  It hasn't logged many flight hours.  Hmm.  And how about the pilots?  From what I've read it is quite a different experience flying Airbus vs. Boeing.

I'm posting this to a friend who is a bigger aviation geek than anyone I met in three years of working at airports... and a friend who is pilot for Southwest Airlines.  I'm curious about they think.

Channeling Mr. Nottger

In 8th grade I had a class on earth science, which had a section on weather.  One day I bounded into class and before the bell rang I said, "It's a beautiful day outside!  We are lucky to be here in earth science studying weather..."

Mr. Nottger was not pleased by the way he thought I was mocking him and the class.  He called me aside and forced me to sit in the corner until class started.  Seriously.

During the class we did a project where we learned that as you go up in the atmosphere temperatures drop (no surprise) but at a certain elevation temperatures actually rise before dropping again.  Before we completed the project I said, "Oh, this is to show that temperatures actually go up above the troposphere."

Mr. Nottger looked at me and said, "Yes.  I have never had a student who knew that."

I basically replied, "I am a weather geek and until today I loved studying weather."

The look on his face was priceless.  At that age I didn't know the term calling someone a "douche" but that's what it was.

*****
Last week I was so convinced that my students had cheated big time on a quiz that I spent hours writing two completely different finals (with two versions each - four finals in total).  I asked the solid A students to take the final at a different time (so others couldn't cheat off of them).  I gave the final in a really large room with assigned seats and had a colleague join me to help monitor.

The result?  The scores were really high.  Apparently, my students didn't cheat more than normal last week; they actually learned the material.

May wonders never cease.

And, yes, I feel like a douche.

T-minus ten and counting

Without much thought I bought a large supply of Coke Zero and Bud today.  As I was making trips hauling it up to my apartment I thought, "Wait, will I drink all of this before I leave next Wednesday?"  The answer is probably yes.

Since I always need something to fuel my pre-flight anxiety I have two for this trip:  First I will be flying on a new plane.  Exciting, right? A new plane on a 15 hour flight.  Let's just hope they didn't miss any kinks when they tested it out.  Etihad supposedly has world-class service so I am looking forward to the flight.

Etihad customer service (pre-flight) blows.  The whole reason I spend $270 on a credit card with them was to get the miles and freebies that come with it.  The main freebie I wanted was an extra 40 pounds of luggage.  Now I'm told that's not available for the flights to US and Canada.  (Never mind that at every point I said, "I'm doing this for the extra luggage to Chicago... I'm doing this for the extra luggage to Chicago."  Only after card paid for and ticket paid for am I told, "So, sorry, you don't qualify."

I have 60 pounds of stuff to take back to the US for a friend who moved back to Illinois.  I'll suck it and pay the fees because this friend - Imad - is the same guy who counseled me during salary negotations this spring.  It's safe to say I would be $350 less per month for the next three years if it were for Imad insisting I demand an even higher salary.  Assuming I stay for three more years his advise saved me $12,000.  I think I can handle some baggage fees to get the rest of his stuff home.

I haven't given any thought of what to pack because I don't have much of anything *to* pack.  I can bring you  real cinnamon toothpicks from a cinnamon tree... but they sound better than their bitter taste.

Yeah, I don't have much to bring home beyond a weary traveler grateful to see his dog. 

Final sauna

I am giving my final today and tomorrow.   Today the air conditioning went out.  The temperature outside was 114 degrees and the stifling air inside seemed even hotter.  I probably sweated out a gallon of water.  I bought every bottle of water the campus store had and gave them to my students.  I became so dehydrated that now - four hours later - my eyes are dry.

Even though the students were sweating buckets like me, only a few took off their guttra (head scarf).  Now that's dedication to custom!

******

After the exam I received this message:
"Thank for my god i did well in the final. Also, thank you beacuse you were a perfect instractor.  Please help me get A.  God bless u always and take care of your self."

That's about as perfect as a message can get:  Two thankings for god, self-congratulatory, praise for me, request for the A and a polite ending.  That's a lot packed into four sentences.

*****
Unrelated, yesterday I asked an Emirati friend, "Do they start teaching you guys how to suck up in third grade?"

"Oh, no," he said, "we hated our elementary and high school teachers.  The sucking up only started in college."

"Quick learners," I replied.

From bad to worse

Many people get seasonal depression.  We call it the winter blues.  I seem to get summer depression.  It's not fully logical but, hey, I'm always a little different.

Today my men's class finally pushed me over the edge.  They cheated on a test and then whined about the few questions they missed.  I now have a weekend to contemplate what to do for their final on Monday.  

*****

The class I'm teaching this summer (operations management) is a pretty interesting class.  The class examines things like how McDonalds works the way they do.  Why do you pick a line at the grocery store but take a number at customer service?  

My goal is that students will view the world slightly differently.  Sometimes I succeed.  This summer I failed.

Oh well, I at least I get a paycheck.

Medical screening

I posted this picture before:

 A friend on FB posted it from the clinic where expats (workers from foreign countries) must go to be screened.  If a worker is deemed "unfit" he is sent packing for home.

When I arrived on Monday the room looked pretty much the same as in the pic above.  There are four stages to move through and all have long queues.

For a mere Dh 100 ($27) you can bypass all of the lines.  It was easily the best Dh 100 I have spent in this country.  I was in and out in less than 20 minutes.

I don't anyone who has ever failed this mini-physical but I was concerned.  Why?  I feel like crap... and I have for a long time.  The only other times in my life when I've felt this way were caused by medical problems - no thyroid in my system - or a psychological problem - depression.  I'm not depressed.  I'm not perfect on taking my thyroid medicine but there's enough my system that that can't be it.

I feared that I had contracted something... perhaps during my trips to Sri Lanka or Nepal.  And I may have, this screen is only designed to rule out the biggees:  Malaria, TB, AIDS, etc.

All I know is that I was relieved to get the paper that said "Fit."  This means I'm good for working here for another three years.

Perhaps the malaise I feel is because this summer is much hotter than my first summer in this country back in 2009.  I know it's hot back in Iowa right now, but we're hitting 120 pretty much every day here... and it's been over 115 for weeks.  Maybe all will be well when I'm back breathing the fresh air of Iowa.

Two weeks from this moment I should be somewhere over eastern Canada on my to a stopover in Chicago before connecting to Cedar Rapids.  After a day of dealing with spectacularly bad customer service I am sooo ready to come home.

Ames straw poll

I will be back in Iowa in time for the Ames Straw Poll.  It's a huge deal in Republican politics.  It sent Lamar Alexander and Elizabeth Dole packing.  In the last cycle it eliminated Senator Brownback.  In this cycle it will likely eliminate former Governor Pawlenty of Minnesota.

So, as it draws near I have to decide who to support when I drive the lonely drive to Ames.

With a husband as fabulous as hers, Michelle Bachman is looking like a good choice.

It's gonna be a hot one...

I worked summer school in 2009 and Iowa had the best July in history.  The highest high was only 83!  So I live in Iowa for 40 years and miss the one really awesome July.  Many of friends assumed the weather was good because I was not home.  Well, this July I'm also not home and the weather has not been great and the forecast for the next week is a scorcher.  I've watched these forecast models for 30 years (going back to the TV show AM Weather on PBS at 6:45 in the morning).  I've never seen a map that looked like this:

It's gonna be a hot one.

I have been smiling the whole time I've been writing this post.  If it's gonna be this hot in Iowa I'm happy to be the (hotter, but dry heat) UAE making money.

Quote of the day: Tales from the unemployed

This guy used to make over $100k and he's now unemployed:

"Stay up too late at night and sleep too long in the morning. Drink way too much … stare at the computer screen, stare out the window, stare at your image in the mirror, stare at the ceiling fan … Social life--none. I'm no fun. Sex--none. Women would sooner hear you have Hepatitis then learn you're unemployed … Depressed--big time. Think suicide every day."

The rest is an interesting, albeit depressing, read.

Thank you, Mitch McConnell

I'm hard pressed to think of a Republican I'd be less likely to thank.  Dick Cheney?  Michelle Bachman?  (Oh, wait, I might support her in the Ames Straw Poll in August...)

His proposal to just give up on deficit-reduction plans may be one of the best things I've heard in weeks.  The President was willing to raise the age of eligibility for Medicare to 67, screw poor families by reducing the already meager Pell grants for college students, throw future social security recipients into poverty by reducing the cost of living increases... and all for what?

What he'd get is the Republicans to agree to allowing taxes for the rich to go back to the level they were in the Clinton era.

The political operation that elected a black man with the name Hussein as a middle name can't be underestimated but I have been shocked by the "grand bargain" they made with Speaker Boehner.  They gave conservatives 83% of what they wanted (cuts 83%, closing loopholes 15% - what happened to the other 2% is something I haven't found in any news article).  In return they gave away a great issue in the 2012 election:  Who is on the side of working-class Americans and who is on the side of the rich?

So Mitch McConnell's offer to just punt - allow the raise in the debt ceiling but force the president to come up with cuts that have no chance of every passing into law - is fantastic news for the country and Democrats.

In politics it's always important to see who blinks first.  I was very scared it was going to be our side.  Fortunately, it was not.  I heart you, Mitch.  I'd offer more love but that's illegal in Kentucky.  If only I were your female first-cousin and we lived in Tennessee...

First Read offers a good run-down on the politics of this.

Summer midterms

I gave my midterms today.  The women scored almost exactly where I thought they would but the men scored much higher.  Naturally, I assume there is cheating but I am not certain how.  I gave them assigned seats.  The test was online and the questions came to them random with no way of going back after they answered a question.  I stood in the back of the room to watch their screens for most of the exam.  I told them to keep their hands above the table at all times (to avoid using a cell phone in their lap).

At one point I was answering a question and I saw a guy near the front literally turn his computer to another student.  I yelled, "What the hell  are you doing?"  If you're reading this and feeling deja vu it's because I've written about this happening before.

When it comes to cheating there are easy tell-tale signs and the biggest is that on a question most of the class missed they will all have the same answer.  There is literally no evidence of the men cheating.  *shocking*  In fact, there is some pretty good evidence the women cheated.  Less shocking, but still surprising. They had two questions where 70% answered the same wrong answer.

 *****
I, umm, don't know how I can write about this.  In my three years here I have never received outside pressure to give a better grade to a student.  Let's just say that yesterday I was approached by an assistant to a person in power about a student.  (The credentials of this person were sealed by the vehicle he drove and the incredible level of respect given to him by the students who passed by - the locals all knew him.)

I lost sleep over this.  Basically, I freaked out.  What if the kid bombs?  I'm not giving a good grade because someone is politically powerful... but I also don't like the idea of possibly losing my job because I pissed of someone who is politically powerful.

The good news?  The guy performed well.  By coincidence his assigned seat was near the back of the classroom where I spent most of my time.  He performed well and I know he didn't cheat because I was standing six feet away from him.

Facebook instant message of the day

I have a friend on FB that has limited English skills.  Today he sent this to me:

yes morning sir
sir i have one question ,,, what is the difference between comunist and liberal
if u can solve my question becasue i have little doubt
SIR PLZ IF POSSIBLE GIVE ME THE ANSWER

I smiled because I have conservative friends who would say, "No difference!"  Give me your answers and I'll reply to him later.

What I do not look forward to

Every three years a worker-bee (85% of the population of this country) is required to go to a hospital for a basic physical.  The physical itself doesn't really scare me (although three years ago they found my blood pressure to be too high).  What I don't don't look forward to is spending a day at hospital waiting for one test after another.  A friend took this picture a couple of weeks ago.  Note:  This is the men's section.  Heaven forbid men and women mix in a hospital.

Supposedly, for Dh 100 ($27) you can bypass all of the lines.  I'd happily pay a multiple of that if it is true.

So my paying $27 gets me to budge ahead of people (99% of the people in the picture above) who can't afford it.  Where's the good liberal in me?  I'll have to make it up somewhere because three years ago this experience from almost made me want to get on a plane back to the US.

A reason to be happy: I have a job!

Today's unemployment report is depressing:  only 18,000 new jobs added last month after only 25,000 the month before.  We need 200,000 -250,000 per month for a solid six months before we can call this a real recovery.

What depresses me more is that the Obama administration has fallen into the Republicans trap by allowing the focus to be on debt and deficits.  Remember, House Speaker Boehner voted for wars in Afghanistan and Iraq without a way to pay for them.  He supported a costly prescription drug benefit without a way to pay for it and huge tax cuts aimed mostly at the rich.  He didn't care about the affect of deficits then but now they are important?

The government should not be running a deficit in good economic times but it should run in bad times.  That's not "liberal economic thought" it's mainstream and conservative as well.  No serious conservative economist is proposing massive budget cuts right now.

There are only a few ways an economy starts growing quickly after a bad recession.  Usually the housing sector leads the way.  No chance this time.  Sometimes the prices of commodities drop (think gas and food) and that acts like a tax cut.  The reverse is happening this time.  The government can increase spending on things like bridges, roads, hospitals, etc.  The Fed can lower interest rates to get people borrowing again.  Rates are already as low as they can go - there's not much more the Fed can do.

I'm trying not to be in a bad mood but today's news is nothing short of depressing.

What creates a mood?

For a week I've been carrying around $2000 trying to find the bank where I could pay off my credit card that I charged my flight back to the US.

Yesterday I couldn't find the money.

I tore my apartment apart.  I have been driving some friends' vehicles (so their tires don't melt into the pavement over the summer) so I searched them thoroughly.  No luck.

I had had some laborers in my apartment in the past few days doing minor repairs.  "Did they find it?" I wondered.  The maid came and cleaned while I was gone... but I saw the money since then, right?

It's safe to say I didn't get much sleep last night.  This morning on my drive to work I remembered where I thought it was - raced back home - and found it.  Also, after spending hours driving around the city looking for the bank I finally found it and paid off the card.

You'd think I'd feel relieved and happy, but I'm not.  Maybe it's because a friend asked a personal question by e-mail and spent a long time writing a reply only to have it disappear for no reason.  Maybe it's because my summer classes got on my nerves this week.  Maybe it's because I feel like I have no friends; which is somewhat true since those I have here have gone.

Or maybe it's because I expected a summer of sleep but even that has eluded me.  Regardless, it is now the weekend and I hope I get into a better mood.

Or maybe it's because I couldn't get this video to post on the blog:  It's worth watching.

Egypt update

Some of my Egyptian friends are now back Egypt and the story is good and bad:  The revolution seems to have taken hold and most associated with the old regime of Mubarak are out of any power.  The problem is the streets are not safe in many parts of the city.  The police were pro-Mubarak so they have been discredited and their ranks have dwindled.  The military - who facilitated the revolution are trying to take over the police duty but it's not enough.  

On the bright side, if you can avoid getting robbed the tourist sites are dirt cheap - a dollar to take a camel ride at the Pyramids.  

******

Learned something new:  My friend Mohammed Hussein (a former student) is spending the summer in Egypt and his sister is getting married next week.  Because a relative died in her fiance's family there can be no music at the wedding or reception.  If anyone in the extended family dies there can be no music played in the presence of the family for 40 days afterward.  

How interesting!  If we did that in the US nervous couples would be calling all cousins on a regular basis before the wedding, "Remember, drive safe.  Look both ways before you cross the street... Make sure grandma takes her medicine..."

Emiratis for dinner

For the first time in the 3 years I've lived here, I had Emiratis for dinner.  They were so much tastier than the bitter Brits I had last month.

*rimshot*

But seriously... the two guys I had over are Emiratis who attend Iowa State.  While they have lived in the US for two years they've never had a traditional Iowa meal.  I made pot roast, mashed potatoes, gravy, sweet corn, and cabbage (which they both avoided).  

What do they like about living in Iowa?  Sliding around corners in the snow.  

What do they dislike about living Iowa?  Pretty much everything else.

My Iowa pride is still intact.  In fact, I'd tell any Emirati here, "If you want to see the bright lights of the big cities AND remain a faithful Muslim don't go to Iowa - a state where we have no real big cities and the pigs outnumber the humans 3 to 1." 

I am bringing Mohammed - the one who first contacted me on FB a couple of months ago - to my class this week.  I look forward to seeing the response.

Dubai in fog

Normally the world's tallest building would be in this picture.  A strange mixture of fog and sand has enveloped the country.  It's not quite the same as fog; the streetlamps at night have a very strange glow.  

I made the trip to Dubai to shop for a new chair at Ikea (no longer sold) and a specific vacuum cleaner (out of stock).  The trip was not a complete bust, however, as I had the chance to spend several hours with the only Emirati I knew before coming here:  Yousef.